Having Kids
“Having kids is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.” – Martin Mull
Read moreCategory: Ideas
LSD
“Why do you only hear bad news about lsd? It’s always the same story about some idiot who thought he could fly, so he jumped out a fifty-story window. Why don’t we ever hear this news story? ‘Today a young man took lsd and realized that ego is an illusion and that we are all part of the universe experiencing […]
Read moreSave The Earth, Do The Dishes
“Everybody wants to save the earth. Nobody wants to help Mom do the dishes.” – P.J. O’Rourke
Read morePolitics
“Politics is just show business for ugly people.” – Jay Leno
Read morePopular In High School
“Trying to be popular in high school is like trying to be mayor of a city that won’t exist in four years.” – Jenny Holzer
Read moreSelf Help
“I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.” – Steven Wright
Read moreConditioned Response: A poetry book by Gary Beck
For Immediate Release Conditioned Response A poetry book by Gary Beck Conditioned Response’ reminds us that we are prepared by family, experience, government to react to the events that affect us in our daily lives, shaping our future, often without our consent. Purchase Links: Paperback (English) | Paperback (English/Tatar) | Kindle eBook Conditioned Response is a 100 page book […]
Read moreMaking A Sick Face
“When faking sick to leave work early, I find it necessary to make a sick face until I’m at least a few miles from the office, just in case someone is following me and watching me.”
Read moreI’ve Gotta Go
Today: tripped over the rug, cut by a knife, hand slammed in the door, whacked in the face by the cabinet door. I’m pretty sure my home had a meeting last night and decided I’ve gotta go.”
Read moreShopping Cart
“I’m 33 and I still hop on the back of the shopping cart and ride it downhill whenever I get the chance.”
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