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The Danger of Keeping Secrets

The Danger of Keeping Secrets

Alcoholics Anonymous has a saying “You’re only as sick as your secrets” which you know is one of the hallmarks of alcoholism, addiction, and deception.  The addict keeps the secret to cover up their addiction which leads them to deceive themselves and others.  When alcoholics become sober, they tend to be totally honest with people, to keep themselves from going back to their habit of drinking and deception.

Telling all at all times is not the best for your health either. Not everyone needs to know all your secrets to lead a happy healthy life, but concealing some secrets is like consuming a slow acting poison.  These secrets have a tendency to start eating at your insides and can lead to stress, sleep disorders, and other unhealthy consequences.

How do you know what secrets to reveal and not reveal?  Well secrets that might cause a person to harm someone or themselves should be told to the right person, like when addicts start back with alcohol, drugs, gambling, or in the case of infidelity of spouses, co-workers, friends, or family.  In the case of addictions – like alcohol or drugs – if the person reveals this it will help in their recovery.  If a spouse cheats on their partner but does it only once and regrets it, this might be one of those that you should not say because it may do more harm that help.  This is a situation where you have to consider the consequences of the action.

If you decide to keep a secret from a close friend, family, or spouse it might cause a barrier between you and them.  In order to not get yourself in this situation it is a good rule to just not keep the secrets in the first place.

Columbia University conducted a study of secrets where they asked 2000 people if they keep secrets.  The average amount of secrets that those people kept was 13 with 5 secrets that they had never told to anyone.  As time went by, they said that they started to feel less healthy and they felt like they were carrying around a heavy burden.

 

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